A New Resolution...

Every year brings a new sense of false hope and unrealistic self-improvement. Personally, I've never managed to honor my new year's resolutions, but as 2009 was fast approaching, I made my wishlist, that for the first time in 26 years, I plan to stick to:

• break a sweat in a 5k race
• finish my master's degree
• skydive
• learn to whisper
• win the espn "streak for cash"

I thought my list was final, until about 2 hours into January 1st, when I added "never peeing on a nintendo game system" to the list.

I've been witness, and also guilty of some bad drunk decisions (i.e. sprinting home after throwing up in Silver Diner with chicken fingers and honey mustard flying). HOWEVER, never in my life did I expect to see what I did on New Year's. After a pretty low-key night of the typical pregame and walk to Four Courts, we came back after our $20 complimentary champagne toast for continued drinking and grilled cheese sammiches. As everyone was getting ready for bed and starting to pass out on couches, we noticed a girl, who had tagged along with one of our friends for the night, was in the living room and pulled down her pants. We assumed she was changing for bed until it happened...she popped a squat and began to pee...on the floor...in the living room...soaking a sega genesis, super nintendo and nintendo. Fortunately, she managed to make it to the bathroom to throw up. Apparently she only needs a toilet for that.